Grieve

When in grief, grieve with the grieving. -VC

Already grieving is so hard, it’s easier to do it together.

The burial was at 10am this morning, later today after Mahgrib there will be a talil for her at the campus surau, Yasin prayers will be said and sholat ghaib will be done.

All seem normal the night before, she text-ed one of her closest friends about settling her visa. The next morning she was hospitalize, she was suppose to get her dialysis but her body couldn’t take it later that day.

Almost dying changes nothing.
Dying changes everything. - House MD

Arriving at the exam hall today everything seem the usual. After that, the hall turned sombre and solemn, her housemates fell apart, one after the other wept silent tears.
Heart-wrenching…
In situations like this handing a kleenex, exchanging condolences and saying prayers are the only all that can be done, but it feels like more needs to be done… but is there anything else?

When words are not enough you give hugs, when hugs are not enough, you give?

The mourning shall pass…

(… for she is in a better place)

 

p/s: this is good read on passing on on ‘How to cope with death’, ::

Inna Lillahi Wa Inna Ilahi Raaji’oon

 

 

the little green boy

I saw a boy

oh so cute

like a little leprechaun dressed in green pants and lime colour shirt

I saw a boy

oh so cute

chubby and robust

I saw a boy

oh so cute

with dirty blond curled locks

I saw a boy

oh so cute!

Full of joy and wonders in his eyes

I saw a boy

oh so cute

he bounces when he walks

I saw a boy

oh so cute

that i wanted to touch

I saw a boy

oh so cute

but it was only for a tad 2 minutes

and he left me googoo-gaga-ing for the rest of the night.

If it wasn’t for the Satpam who was holding the traffic, i would have just stood there and watch that adorable thing until he disappear from my view. If it wasn’t for Akka who was holding me back, i would have gone over and molested the cheeks of that oh so ‘geram-cute’ looking thing!! Niaaaaa!!!!

UberCUTE!!! Too bad i don’t have pics to back up what i saw!

MLIA

Finally! The only thing i like about Ears, Nose and Throat is learning about the NOSE!!
Rhinitis is something i have everyday. I really really really appreciate those days when i don’t get them, and i  really really really feel the contentment of happiness when i am enjoying deep inhalation without any blockage. That particular moment is somehow therapeutic!

I love Derms! Short for Dermatology. Looking at those pictures makes me cringe in disgust! Yet i still like the subject, because it is one of those see, touch, smell sensory that i can use without having to imagine smaller stuff and it’s mechanism in animation!

I’m in a phase where social obligation is nil. I don’t feel like answering to any social calls that is regarding to dress up. I want to dress down or rather just how i want without being overly perk up with accessories or make up. And so, i don’t expect to see myself attending any big social gatherings next month. I’m game for a Beer at the lounge, Coffee for closures, and meal. Not forgetting a few get aways.

My camera battery totally failed on me! So i’ve no time to browse for those rechargeable double A battery.

The health is getting back on track! mweeheehehehe….
p/s: campus life i miss, is one of those better times, where you are able to meet everyone! Lecturers there are nicer too!
Hospital lecturers are either mean, quirky, or both!!!

Trotting

Fox-Trot is fun! One of the nicest ballroom dance to watch at all times!
I am trotting too, exam + healthy trotting

It would be nice for once, before exams i’m not down with a common cold and sore throat. I feel like yanking the uvula and tonsils out to put it aside, after that bore a hole inside the facial sinus to drain the rhinitis out. Meds are not helping, which is strange.

I highly blame the bloody weather today for being so windy! Making the whole of Malang so dusty that triggered the cytokines to overwork

And so, Jansee finally Officially graduated from Uni! As usualy she bid a teary farewell despite the macho upfront she tried. Getting oldddd….. or senior… that’s not cool! More responsibilities for self, take note. How did time pass so fast?

It will be so nice to have a beach a drive away, and a hoodless car to drive and have BBQ. Sat there was a mini BBQ event, held in ylaine’s place. It was good!! It’s nice to chip in some help here and there and watch the traumatise rabbit seeing some bird meat getting grilled over the BBQ pit. Poor thing. Kudos to the chefs!

Had an uncomfortable day in class. I had to put on face mask to prevent spreading common flu to anyway. But i guess i did manage to spread the virus, because throughout 2nd half the class it i hear sniffles and sneezes. What got me more psychogenic, my friends that was sitting beside me was having a block nose, and it’s very uncomfortable for her to breath through her mouth and that got in to my head to cause more congestion in my nasal. Bummer….
It’s so much less inexpressive to talk by looking at someone’s eyes only and with the rest of the face covered, that does not help when u realise a few curious ones were trying to get a glimpse of what is covered. Felt self-conscious.

I lost my taste buds and have totally no hunger pangs.
Took Procold a local fever,flu,headache product and had a short nap. It did it’s work! I’m better, rested well if t wasn’t for some mozzies to attack the ends of my legs and woke me up.

When one is sick, there’s this feeling of wanting your parents to coddle you. Fuss over you taking meds and having meals, occasionally drop by the room and check on you. Pfft… I don’t have them around to do that for me. Oh well, it is ridiculous that a 4th year medical student still wants to be coddle by their parents because it is way about time that one can nurse themselves back to health. Despite that, i want to be coddle back to health… NIAaaa…

now studies beckons… did anyone knew how hard it is to study Throat, Ears and Nose? So is Ophthalmology. Any Tutor is welcome!

Toodles… trotting from rest back to notes. NERDING!

Raya Break

Home is where the heart is.

Everything and everyone is at its place now that’s comforting, to revert to the role of being a potato couch that doesn’t need to lift a finger at all and yet be an heiress of small time in the household. To sleep at late hours of the night and wake up in the late mornings, finding good food laid on the dining table just prepared by granny filled with wholesome flavours of love and warmth, not forgetting the amount of sinful calories laid within it!

How not to be fat la?!!! But i’m happy i wasn’t the only one getting chubbier and healthier, the Twin joined in as well and gain 2kg in one week!! Hahahhaa!! Of course i’m happy to have someone else getting fatter with me! It’s an activity that must be done together-gether, well i reckon the poor chap needs it since he is having his SPM trials.

Balik Kampung this round is utmost wholesomely homely! I kinda like it… i hope it is not because of the absence of nagging from the Oldies which i did not see much of because they were overseas for 1 week plus. I didn’t go up north or down south like i planned to. Kinda figured it won’t happened but at least it’s ok since i manage to shop Met up with friends that i miss for a long time, things were resume from where we left off, as if someone pressed paused on the remote and waited for 7 months to play it. That’s one of the many beauty of long lasting friendships! <3

SLK racing in to the dark night is fun! Bawling with laughter when meeting up Datin and 261, it does seem 17 all over again. Racing time to fill in all this years of info and trying to stay up maximumly till dawn is no easy feat if not for Nescafe Tongkat Ali and Ginseng! OH my!! It’s gotta be so delicious that leaves me wanting for seconds! I love the aroma of it! The Nescafe Fatima has a similar taste as it only less aromatic, most importantly the kick is there!

3D movies are awesome!! It’ll be uber awesome if they added motion master when watching it as well. Thrilling!! Final Destination 4 is a good choice to watch in 3D than G-Force. For a LAugh good movie- The Ugly Truth is highly recommended! It contains the element in girl and guys perspective in a relationship, i would alike the movie to He’s Not That Into You, but definitely give more stars to The Ugly Truth for it’s parody on realism of how a guy view his dates! Entertaining indeed! Many people are comparing the movie with The Proposal! I’ve yet to watch.

Seeing a handful of your friends entering or entered the working world is scary. It’s a reminder of time and brickwall welcome saying:” Welcome to the Working World of Adults”. It’s something i don’t think i can stomach it just yet if it were for me. I do envy them at times, yet the old bean did say that it is not something he would encourage us to do- to enter the working field at a very young age. He prefer us to study as much as possible before embarking in the journey of workdom. I know why he said that, because he is the sort of person who enjoys his education no matter where he is.

Before i end this hanging post because i’m too tired to blog anymore, i want to state there will be 180 degrees changes on the future blog entries. I find myself not having the leisure to blog any more lengthy posts of my diurnal or nocturnal events that uses up most of my brain to filter what i should say or not. It’s going to be more random and short, hopefully with more informative inputs and creative jibes i can conjure up on spur.

Nights! Academic life in the hospital classroom is bloody hectic! I wish there was a free flow of caffeine machine to cater to us, so that we get all palpitated and charge up in classes!