Four years…
During Pre-University Padjadjaran until now, today 5 somthing pm
It will be mean if i said i foresee it,
It will be insensitive for me to break hopes,
At the end, i really hope that your passing was an easy one without pain that you have to endure.
Do you know it is hard to for the news to sink in, when it did, it is just overwhelming. How do the dear ones pick up and continue living, when death just came knocking on the next door. All of sudden, the time around you seem to seize though the clock continues ticking, the flood of memories that you have comes in gradually. Trying to sit down and collect yourself and study is hard, the mind keeps floating elsewhere back when life was still breathe into you.
Chronologically passage of time:
Pre-U, the fun trips, the gatherings, the struggles just to get into medic school, the disappointments of not getting into UnPad, the plan-B of sitting for Brawijaya, the entrance exam and the Green Ticket.
The adaptation, staying under a roof with the same Ibu Asuh, the ragging session, learning to sing the PKPMI songs and the miscellaneous Raya songs, enduring the seniors crazy tantrums, bitching about them later,adaptation field trip, the many crazy performances for seniors and PKPMI, my eye patch and your eye infection, learning to kawat with you, Paparons (our first) with you, hadi and faizah; walking insanely from Soehart to practically everywhere!; getting through the rough times during adaptation and OSPEK, the mutual friend we made in matos, the photostickers that is still in my purse, the small talk we had that stays in my head.
The last time i met you was back in July, when we were in UNISMA Hospital visiting the sick ones that had dengue. The last thing you offered us was the Amanda Brownies that you bought. Dear god, that was the last memory i had of her.
You’re quiet, never boisterous but full of life when getting to know you.
It’s so sad that at such a young age you have to go, I wish we knew earlier, i wish you had done a check up 4 years ago.
Anemia can be a hereditary in the family, i hope people won’t take the matter lightly and go for a check up, just to make sure in the long run their health is tip-top. So that it won’t be too sudden to find out 4 years later that you have end stage bilateral kidney damage, and the only option you left with is dialysis or kidney transplant.
Be an organ donor, it saves life.
Last but not least, you still had so much of hope and relentless passion in continuing your studies in Semester 7 with us, even though you knew the prognosis. You were planning to return. And I bet you still remember that both you, me and Yam are suppose to do our hospital attachment 
You were planning on returning…
I will miss you Laila Mastura. 
:: May Peace be with You and Allah (swt) at you side always ::
