Nursery Rhymes that went bad.

Posted on September 1, 2007


Mary had a little pig,
She kept it fat and plastered;
And when the price of pork went up,
She shot the little bastard.


Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her,
Between two slices of bread.

JACK AND JILL Went up the hill
To have a little fun.
Stupid Jill forgot the pill
And now they have a son.


SIMPLE SIMON met a Pie man going to
the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the Pie man,
“What have you got there?”
Said the Pie man unto Simon,
“Pies, you Dumb Ass”


HUMPTY DUMPTY sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the kings’ horses,
And all the kings’ men.
Had scrambled eggs,
For breakfast again.


HEY DIDDLE, DIDDLE the cat took a
All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such
Then died of electric shock.


GEORGIE PORGY Pudding and Pie,
Kissed the girls and made them cry.
And when the boys came out to play,
He kissed them too ’cause he was gay.