Relapse

Posted on September 8, 2007

2


one of the best thing of going home after being away for a period of time is that you get to play the role of “you”. -VerbatimCries

In every different cliques and situation you play a different role, showing a different persona of yourself. There will always be personal interest and benefits clashes with others that leads to web of conflicts.

Born&expensive

I like playing the role of the middle-child when i’m home by being the dungu at home, doing nothing =p Shaking my leg while hogging my Pop’s fav chair. Staying up watching the early reruns of my tv show on AEC, enjoying the house stillness while i make noises around. Being the blur-est of the family. Going up to parents’ room just to find mom and perhaps chat with her about random things and views on happenings in life. Teachers do see things more simpler, nicer and lead you back to the right path of life. Catching up with the older sibling on growing up, arguing and making plans that won’t work. The thought counts though. Agitating dad just because i somehow manage to do it without intentions, waiting for one of my favourite sentences from him “what do you want?” and he’s hard to bargain with at times; he’s nagging is lethal that makes you wish for not making that mistake in the first place. Making life a lil tougher for the younger sibling when i’m around, less talk but more action with the brat, making empty threats and scolding him that wouldn’t work on that giant of him, allowing him to eat most just because i can try more =P Seeing grandma and listen to her gush about how hard life must it be as a student abroad, fattens me by cooking, looking at me in a way-for she sees me as the grandchild who is small but growing older, not being able to ‘tipu’ anymore. Sometimes i feel a lil forlorn for not being able to be that grandkid who gets bluff by her granma cos it just makes her happier. Trips to aunt’s place is always a trip for getting spoil and going for lots of eats, learning new healthy eats of hers! Listening to stories of antics from cute little kids.

Being nice to everybody is hard, sometimes you have to do things that you do not like or want but it’s all in the game. It gets pretty confusing at the end of the day when you start questioning yourself. I like to asses everything into black and white if possible for it’s easier to scrutinize the details, if not everything should be in the shade of Grey.

When your mad world starts getting madder, is just best to be at home, the sanctuary of being yourself. Back to where you belong.

i’m saying this not because my life is getting any crazier, is just that some friends of mine are really having a hard time and home is what they are thinking of now. People can be harsh, the world can be cruel and the home is the remedy.

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Posted in: Relationship, Unsaid